old men and horny chickens

About a year ago I started buying whole chickens to boil and then shred instead of buying canned shredded chicken.  I did this for a few reasons: 1. to save money, 2. because I don't like chicken and shredded chicken is easier for me to hide in recipes and, 3. because if I am able to eat the chicken I will be more likely to serve it for dinner and I know my kids should eat chicken.
After a while of doing this I got pretty comfortable with the routine and the only thing that really bothered me was removing the kidneys and liver.  So I decided to go even farther and save a few more bucks.  I bought a chicken that still had the gizzards and the neck.  OMG, I have never been so afraid of a dead piece of meat in my life!!!!!  You may think afraid is the wrong word and you would be right...I was terrified!  When I cut open the bag, what looked like a shriveled up penis literally POPPED out at me!  I had to call my mom and have her talk me through getting the gross horny looking bird ready to boil.  She laughed at me the whole time and I was on the verge of puking and tears for about an hour.
This experience really made me appreciate my grandmothers and their entire generation.  No wonder women were considered prudes back then, if I had to look at that chicken everyday and then go to bed with a horny man I might throw up right there on the bed.  I'll admit that a young mans penis looks much more appealing than a skinned chicken neck; and yes, I use the words "young man" because I have seen a lot of old man penis' and they tend to look more like the shriveled chicken neck than they do a young man's penis.  On the other hand I have not seen many old man penis' when the said old man is actively horny.  And I say "actively" because the horny old men I've seen don't get a prescription for Viagra in the nursing home. Although one did have a penile implant that he refused to deflate...
I think I'll skip eating any of the chicken I shredded tonight...I'm not in the mood.